TED Talks suck

Ted Talks. They suck.

Have I listened to every one of them? No. But some of them. And I’m not impressed. In fact, I’m mostly turned off. They suck. Why? Because—-

1. They lack Passion. They are far too “acceptable” and politically correct and say things that are pathetically easy to agree with anyway, but that I very likely could care less about.

2. Where are the conservative Ted Talks? Oh, you might hear one about the dire warnings of climate change, etc.  But where is the TED TALK from someone who thinks climate change is bogus? or who is a member of the NRA? or someone against Globalism? They’re just too liberal all-around. And—-

3. It feels like they don’t have the guts to do TED TALKS on   controversial things, unless it’s to present a very liberal view. They avoid controversy too much. It’s “speeches-lite”, about as boring as anything you might hear in a Toastmasters speech. (Insert big Yawn here).

The Clifton Strengths Finder & the 34 Strengths

Ever have one of one of those moments where you could kick yourself for not paying more attention to something useful, earlier?  Learning more about Psychology and Personality and abilities can be fun. And useful.

Meet: The Clifton Strengths Finder. You can find out what your Top 5 Strengths are.

What comes easy to you? What do you already do well? What are you already strong in? Instead of focusing so much on “overcoming weaknesses”, why not take your strengths and really develop them into something dazzling? Let your competence and abilities Shine!

Here, on YouTube, Tim Collins starts with educating us about the 34 strengths. There is a video for each strength. Many of these are under 2 minutes, and informative!  Thanks, Tim Collins.

Psychology. Is Your Therapist Good or Bad? 12 Questions to help decide.

Psychology. Is your Therapist a good one or a bad one? Former  Psychotherapist Daniel Mackler asks 12 questions.  In any profession, or academic study, I enjoy it when those with inside knowledge are willing to offer a Critique. What do you think? Does he have any valid points?

 

Types of Mental Help Professionals

Feel like you need therapy? Someone professional to talk to?  Counseling? But not sure who does what?

Kati Morton explains the differences in different kinds of mental health professionals. The decision is yours. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfex5wnWZXI

Inventing a NEW Social Media

Many people are dumping Facebook. And Twitter.

Whatever happened to “My Space” ?  Should there be a My Space 2.0 ?

Many people like WordPress. Some like Instagram, Tumblr or Wix.com

So I have a question for you:  If you imagine the “coolest” kind of Blogging platform or social media “thingy”, what would it be like? What would make it The Best? Name 3 must-have features you would want in it.

Some things on my wish-list would be

1. No Text limit  (or, a 12-page limit per post should be enough. Having it doesn’t mean that you always have to use it.). 2. Find other users by Topic/category, and by City. 3. I would actually LIMIT no more than 2 pictures included/attached with any post.

Here’s more: 4. MUCH better control/filtering of any “Timeline” and comments. Such as the ability to Block up to say, 50 users. And also something like: Only show/allow comments and only show me other posts from the country I created my account in. For example, I have no interest in reading posts or getting comments from Bolivia or Uzbekistan or from languages that I don’t speak. Give us the option.

It would also be nice to have some choices to alter colors and fonts. What do you think?

Travis Heinze, Cops and Youtube

Some people you just have to see, or Hear, to believe. Like Travis Heinze, on Youtube.

I guess this guy has no job, lives in his vehicle, drives around to different cities filming parts of the towns and makes Youtube videos. But he also creates a huge amount of trouble for himself with Law Enforcement, needlessly. Like I said, you need to hear him to believe him.

Click this Youtube link to see one of his interactions with law enforcement.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8h9gGuVmnhI

Why is he so defiant and sassy? The Officers I felt were very professional, reasonable and willing to work with him if he simply cooperates! Why not just show them his license and move on? Things could have been so much simpler but he creates alot of his own trouble. The middle of this video “goes Black” but you can still hear the audio. Also, how does Travis get gas money to keep driving to all of these towns?

Ted Talks

Sigh. Where to begin? I have tried to like TedTalks but—-

Over and over again, to me anyway, they seem to be so politically correct or “lite”.

I cant recall listening to ANY that would be “really controversial” where someone argued with passion and good persuasiveness for their case!

Nope. It’s either things that are soooo super-easy to agree with or that everyone knows anyway (so why bother with a speech at all?) or something “safe” that wont ruffle feathers. It reminds me of the sorts of things you might hear in Toastmasters (which is boring as hell).

Has anyone who is a member of the NRA and also “socially conservative” ever been allowed to do a Ted Talk? I say this without bias. I don’t own a gun and am not a member of the NRA.

Maybe I just haven’t heard the right speeches. But so far, it hasn’t been exciting. Sounds like a bunch of liberals preaching touchy-feely stuff.

Boundaries in your Car

A co-worker is giving you a ride home from work. They have music on in their car. It’s not that it’s too loud, you just don’t like it. But hey! They are doing you a favor and they are in charge in their own car just as they are in their own house. So suck it up and shut up.  And Respect their turf!  Right? After all, you are not in charge here.They are.  But—some people try to be anyway. And this leads us right into “Boundaries”. Imagine this, it could easily happen. Will you stand up for your legitimate rights or let yourself get shamed into doing things their way? Who is in charge at *their* house? Likewise, you have the same rights. Here goes:

A family member is riding with you in *your* car and you have the radio or a music CD on while driving. Its music you really like, but they say the music sucks and to turn it off. How do you (or anyone reading this) feel about this conversation? Here is what I feel they would be likely to say, and my responses:

Them: Gawd, that music sucks. Shut it off.
Me: I like it and this is my car.
Them: But I’m a “captive audience”.
Me: #1–NO ONE forced you to ride with me! And its my car. Would you tell someone else what TV channel to have on if you were in their house?
Them: Well, iiiii wouldn’t do things like that. I’d shut it off it you were in my car.”
Me: Maybe. But you would be within your rights either way. But even aside from that: Your-choices-dont-obligate-me!
Them: well, you could have a little more consideration.
Me: IIII could? 2 replies: #1. who is on who’s “turf” here? When iiii’m the passenger, or a visitor at someone else’s place, I do things *their* way. They, or you, can show “consideration” and respect by doing the same for me. and #2. What would I do if you weren’t even here? I’d enjoy this music. Question: why should I diminish my enjoyment any less, or inhibit myself just because you are here?
Them: That sounds selfish. 15 minutes without your music wouldn’t kill you.
Me: And 15 minutes of hearing it won’t kill you, either. I am within my rights if its in my house, on my property or in my car. Just like you are.
Them: Gawd, I hate driving with you.
Me: I can stop the car. You are free to go. No one ever forced you at all.
Comment: There! That should cover the likely objections and arguments. One more thing—suppose I *did* give them their way on this bit with the radio. How soon would it be before they found 6 other ways and situations for me (or you) to be more “considerate” ? You get to be “courteous” but they will never admit to being “manipulative”, bossy, or trying to run things when they are at your place, will they? I didn’t think so. It’s an ongoing battle but we usually feel better when we stand up for our rights

 

Boundaries & Family. “Kindness” or Manipulation?

There is a good book on Boundaries, which you can get through Amazon.com called: Where To Draw The Line, by Anne Katherine.

But here’s a scenario/question I’d like to share, not in the book.
Who is in charge in your house or apartment? You are, or should be. Why? Because it’s *your* place! But if that’s true, then what if:

Your brother or sister comes over to stay for a few days, maybe a week. Let’s say your parents are also coming over, too and that you have a 2 or 3 bedroom place, so there is room for everyone to stay overnight. Even though they are family, you are still in charge of your own place and family or not, they should “respect your house” and that it’s “your house, your rules”. After all, who is in charge in their house? Simple enough. But what if your brother or sister decided to intrude on or ignore your boundaries “by doing a good thing”? Such as: Family is visiting you. Let’s say you go to the Mall in the daytime because you enjoy it and will be gone all afternoon til say, an hour before dinner. But, while you were out, let’s say your brother or your sister got the bright idea of going the grocery store, buying some meat, veggies and a bunch of food items and–without informing or asking you at all–just decided that they would cook dinner for everyone, using your kitchen, and they wont let you pay them back for the food they bought. You come back from the Mall, walk in the door and its 15 minutes before everything is ready.

It might be very tempting to just say: KEWWWL! Somebody cooked for me and it didnt cost me a dime, but—think further. is it really as simple and innocent as that? Or, would you feel like someone else “took over” and “ran right over you without asking first”? Maybe so they could one-up you and be “star of the show” in your own house? Or at the very least, ignoring you and overstepping their bounds? Let’s go further still. Suppose you do think so, but that your Mom or Dad defends that person, saying how it was all so “kind-hearted” of them, would you still think it was wrong? Are you going by what you feel or how others tell you how you should feel? How would you feel? Why? What if after dinner you all wanted to go see a movie and this same person picked the one you will all go to see, while visiting your house? Don’t you feel like this person is “taking over”? If no, why not? If yes, suppose they offered to pay the bill for everyone, does that mean they get their way or make the decision? Beware of manipulators offering gifts. How do you feel about all this? Boundaries are a very interesting topic.  –  TheOwl30

 

ISTP Misconceptions

EJArendee talks about ISTP misconceptions via YouTube.  Good info. I wish more people would question the profiles of the 16 Types that they can read online.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lMzcnf0uRaM

BOOK: The 60-second Shrink by Arnold A. Lazarus PH.D. and Clifford N. Lazarus, PH,D.

Book: “The 60-second Shrink” (Over 100 Strategies for Staying Sane in a Crazy World) by Arnold A. Lazarus PH,D. and Clifford N. Lazarus PH,D.

Lots of useful advice in this book! From the Table of Contents: 1. What to Say When You Talk to Yourself

22. The Dangers of Faulty Positive Thinking

31. Setting Realistic Goals

41. Keys to a Successful Marriage

62. Assertion, Aggression and Passivity

89. The Three Major Types of Psychotherapies

97. Got a Problem? Take Something for it? Or Do Something About it?

And there’s much more. A useful and handy reference to have.

Over-used Words.

Funny how there are different “cool” words, over time, that are used to describe things. Or is it? Because they get sooo over-used that it’s easy to get sick of them.

“Amazing!”  How often have you heard that one? What isn’t “amazing” these days?  It’s over-used. If you had to describe anything very positively for the next 2 weeks but you couldn’t say “Amazing”, what other word would you use?

“Surreal” . That’s another one. Ughh,  I never did understand how that one *ever* caught on! Why not simply say “unreal” or “hard to believe” or incredible?

Or–“Obfuscate”. Seriously, we could all live out our entire lives and never once have to bother even mentioning the word “obfuscate.”

Or, when anything is: a “Pejorative”.  Who are they trying to impress with their ultra-grammar vocabulary?  Just say Insult or put-down and be done with it. But there’s more—

To “Exacerbate”. You always know you’re talking to a hard-core Liberal when you hear that one. Probably an Activist. I never hear “exacerbate” in real-life. But I hear it fairly often on TV News. Usually from a protester, or someone who makes an “issue” out of everything.  Why say “Exacerbate” at all? Maybe they’re trying-too-hard to show-off how “educated” they are. Pffffftt! Why not just say: (to) “make worse”, “aggravate” or “Amplify”?  You never hear about anything GOOD being “exacerbated”. No one ever “exacerbated” an Orgasm.

Some words are kinda kewl but don’t last. I remember one year back in High School, whenever something was super-cool, it was “Outrageous!” That was the cool word. For awhile, everything was “Outrageous”. But the next year, students didn’t say that. I forget what the very next “word” was.

One word has stood the test of time and somehow hasn’t gotten irritating. “Cool” or “kewl”. That one, has lasted over different generations.

Some words, are just plain weird. Like: “Fleek”. Do I even wanna know what that is? Umm, not really. Why was this ever invented? Someone is trying to hard too be inventive.

Whatever happened to “Awesome!” ?   And isn’t it kinda funny that “hottest” and “Coolest” can both be used to mean the same thing? And what will be the cool word in 2020?  And will we get sick of hearing it?  Say it simple. Because simpler is better. And Cooler. (wink)